A very quick gratitude post to say that I am grateful that I get to see my students one more time; we’ll go to the food park or Chuy’s afterschool today! I’m grateful I get to see my co-mentor Chris today, I will miss him! I am grateful that I will get tons of stuff done today and hopefully some of that will be packing—giving up on orgazninzed pakcing, it’s time to throw sh$$ in boxes and mail it!!! Grateful to be able to buy a new Chromebook. I’m grateful I get to be in Paris on my Half-Bday! I’m grateful for my Sister who helped me get my teaching license the hell out of FL! I’m grateful that I am relocating to China!!! Yay!
What a friends for? Well one thing, to remind you to get back into "appreciation mode" when you are stressed! Well then, I'll start off by being grateful to my friend Julie, who reminded me of just that when I told her I have so much to do before I depart and so little time that I am considering whether or not to cancel my Bon Voi-agee Partee! Erk...
So first of all I am grateful for my friends: all my friends who have offered help through this relocation! And I am specifically grateful for Julie, who I met so many years ago and became fast friends in the way-back-when of "FoodHole", and who is sweet and kind and beautiful and uplifting! Thank you, Julie!
I am grateful for lists... lots and lots of lists that change each day and sometimes get items marked through, LOL! I am grateful for each item I get to cross off as DONE!
I am grateful to have a rental car.
I am grateful I sold the truck!
I am grateful I have the means to rent a car!
I am grateful I have the means to buy what I need for this trip, and a little extra for splurging!
I am grateful that this "simple" move to China has turned into multi-dreams-come-true!
I am grateful that I have SO MUCH to donate to the good people helped by Refugee Sevices of TX* and SAFEplace**!
Ok, that's all the time I have for gratitude... gotta do it again tomorrow to stay sane!!! :-))
I’m feeling pretty stressed about all I have to do in the next 8 days!! I know I can do it (I don’t have a choice LOL) but it sure would be easier if I held onto my truck one more day and didn’t have to spend all day in Houston tomorrow! I have so much packing and organizing to do! I still need boxes! I have to run to FedEx and make sure I have copies (extra copies) of EVERTHING so there is no hold up at the Consulate tomorrow. Still need to sell my bike and some other stuff, donate a whole bunch of stuff... aagh!
And my heart is feeling hurt about the recent interaction with some close family not my FTW people!) who just don’t give a damn about me... it’s something I’ve known a long time, but it has been reinforced recently with my move to China.
On the bright side, I am grateful that I have a portion of family who care for me and love me. I am grateful for wonderful friends who care for me and love me. I am grateful that I have achieved enough financial prosperity that I can afford the extra $$ I’m shelling out for the move and visa and going out with friends and family. I’m grateful that I can afford the car service and rental cars I need now that I sold the truck. I sold the truck! Whoo Hoo! For a bit more than I expected, too! I’m grateful that it is all coming together and working out. I’m grateful—sooooooooverrrrrrrygratefulllllllll—for this new teaching position in China! China! I am so grateful I am moving to China! And Paris! I get to spend FOUR FULL DAYS in Paris!!! It may be harried and hurried, but I CAN DO IT ALL—I can do everything I need to do before I leave in 8 days, 4 hours, and 29 minutes!!! Aagh! I need to stop writing my gratitude here and go pack! LOL!
And I’m grateful I feel better, now that I have remembered everything for which I am grateful, and written it here on the “paper” of my blog! I needed a wave of gratitude to get me out of the “fear” of not finishing everything and the sadness of rejection.
我能行 Wo Neng Xing!
je peux le faire!
나는 그것을 할 수있다!
I can do it!
I am so grateful that SOME of my family are actually kind to me and care about me, and demonstrate it! They give me double the love so that it can make up for the others who don't give a damn or who are so toxic, their love is poisonous and harmful.
I've been able to spend some wonderful time with my fam in FTW, and even though it was so short, it was wonderful. I always wish I had more time with them, they are wonderful people and wonderful to me. My FTW family has always been kind and loving to me, whether I was around or not!
It's a blessing to feel loved by family, (for a change)!
If I hadn't let myself get so stressed out...
I would not have "lost" my car downtown that day...
I would not have decided that I needed a break-- I was tooooo stressed out! -- so F it all; I took the remainder of the day "off" from visa-seeking madness and instead, sought a film to relax my mind...
I would not have ended up at the Austin Film Society Theatre to see Agnes Varda's "Faces Places" (aka "Visage Villages" and her French name is pronounced ahn-yay' vahd'-dah)...
I would not have been inspired by the panoramic images of small town France...
I would not have been reminded of my desire to stroll the halls of Musee de Louvre, though at a much slower place than Mme Varda and JR, as they flew along the Grande Galerie...
I would not have thought to give a Paris layover one last look in my airfare search, before I settled on Seoul...
I would not have come home and searched for airfares...
I would not be flying to Paris in 12 days!!!
In a grande finale, I am so grateful I was stressed and recognized it and decided to take a break!
I am so grateful for my Goddess Serendip to guide me to a French auteur's semi-autobiographical documentary, (or as Koganada would define it: a video essay); nee' a cinécriture (writing on film) -- a descriptive the filmmaker herself used.
I am so grateful I am flying to Paris for a mini-break and rest before I venture on to another Great Adventure in China!
I am so grateful I will get to cry tears of gratitude and appreciation and wonder at the visions on canvas in Le Louvre!
I am so grateful I get to pay homage to my favorite author, Victor Hugo, at his grave in Paris, in Le Pantheon.
I am so grateful I have my air tickets and that part is over!
I am so grateful I get to fly first class to Paris!
I am so grateful I have 12 days to pack and ship and sell and donate!
I am so grateful I am finally leaving Austin!
I am so grateful that several of my dreams/goals/visualizations are fulminating all at once, loudly, born from one important decision!
I am so grateful that I get to live in China!
I am so grateful I have been hired by an International Baccalaureate World school!
I am so grateful I to learn another language: Mandarin! (!!!!!!)
I am so grateful to feel so grateful!
I am so grateful for the massive financial prosperity (finally) coming my way!
I am so grateful that the toil and tears of the last 4 years have paid off!
I am so grateful to be provided a HUGE flat--for me me me me ONLY!!!
I am so grateful to get to live alone again!
I am so grateful I will be able to have a dog again!
I am so grateful I have already "met" a group of expats in Chengdu, become acquainted with my future teachers, and already made friends with my future coworkers!
I am so grateful I get the opportunity to live in one of the four greatest ancient civilization; a culture spanning more than four millennia! (!!!)
I am just so dang grateful!!!! OMG!!
Je vais a Paris! (I'm going to Paris!)
나는 파리에 갈거야!! (I'm going to Paris!)
我要去法国! (I'm going to France!)
나는 만다린 어를 배운다! ( I will study Mandarin!)
Viva Le France!!! (Hurrah for France!)
나는 중국을 사랑해! (I Love China!)
This past weekend the stress started building... I knew it was happening, and new I was reaching my limit so I took action. Truthfully, I was grateful to feel stress and not anxiety; there is a marked difference in my opinion. Related to my life, stress consists of outside factors, that if left unmanaged, can lead to the physical/emotional/mental result of symptoms characterizing anxiety. Once again, after having so much anxiety (mainly work-related) for so many months and not being able to control the origin nor my reaction, it is quite a relief to recognize that I am starting to feel over-stressed, while holding in awareness that I can control (to a degree) the events causing the stress. More importantly, I am grateful for the awareness that some of my own actions/inactions were increasing the stress-burden!
I have been so busy with visa paper work and research and logistics, that I stopped making time for my morning yoga practice, because I felt I had no time for it. Mealtime has shifted to when I "have time", so I have gone hungry and delayed meals for hours. Exercise became sporadic. Aargh. Even my "downtime" did not feel relaxing because there was the constant shadow of to-do creeping around; whispering, interrupting...
Thus, I am grateful for the awareness because it brought me to a stopping point in this flurry of worry about deadlines, air tickets, departures, arrivals, boxes not yet packed, friends not visited, endless to-do lists carried over from day-to-day, starting my new job fresh, shipping fees, shipping how-to's, etc. My worries were another long list LOL! So I stopped the busy-stressful-work flurries: I called friends in Chengdu for support and guidance and I received it; I was reminded that my new school is much more easy and flexible and they want me to start fresh, rested, and positive; I found answers to the shipping and customs questions which had remained unanswered until then, and I took the rest of the day off and went to see an amazing film that helped me formulate an itinerary for travel... but more on that later! (Hint below...!)
Woke up and realized I only have about two weeks left... and whoa! Feel like I haven't gotten anything done!
I am grateful for new information, self-awareness, organized lists, day-by-day schedules, being meticulous and organized, having energy to deal with all of these To-Dos, new sleep patterns, fun times with friends, opportunities to make new friends, already establishing friendships in Chengdu, a clear vision, clarity in decision making, big suitcases, increased prosperity, and potential for great circumstances and flow coming my way!
I am grateful I got to spend one more day at my old school with my wonderful kiddos and fabulous co-Mentor; plus, it happened to be my co-Mentor's Bday!!! I will miss them all!
I am grateful to feel so loved, valued, and appreciated by my students, their parents, and my co-workers. Thank you all for the past 20 months!
I am grateful to be so many steps closer to obtaining my Chinese Visa! I am feeling positive about receiving the work permit online by Monday! It's usually a 5-day process, but my school liaison (in China) plans to go in Monday and ask if they can rush it, in consideration of Lunar New Year holidays that follow for two weeks!
I am grateful that all my work with our kiddos at school has paid off; I have spent the last year-and-a-half coaching them in breathe awareness, sitting peacefully while mindfully breathing, affirmations, gratitude, intention setting! The replacement teacher was WOW-ed that they could sit still and quiet for so long, breathing with their eyes closed! Keep in mind, these are 5-6 y.o.'s that can now sit for 20+ breaths... longer than many adults can sit still! We started at one breath and just sitting still for 2 seconds!!! I am amazed at my kiddos and grateful that they are learning this much-needed tool at such a young age! Yay!
I am grateful for all my friends and family who are trying to spend time with me before I leave! It is so hard to fit it all in... I haven't had time to pack, sell, or donate anything yet because all this visa paperwork takes up my days and nights... no joke! But so worth it!
I am grateful that I made so many wonderful friends while I was at Integrity Academy in Austin. I just LOVE that I have true and lasting friendships-- friends in Austin, friends in Belgium... friends who are already asking about my vacation time so they can come visit China! LOL
I am so so so so so so so so so grateful for this amazing IB teaching opportunity in China! CHINA!! CHINA!! A dream come true! I am further amazed at my lack of knowledge and naivety when it comes to the progress that China has made, and once again, the discovery of ANOTHER country that is has surpassed the US in so many areas (like KOREA!!) . And I get to live there!!!! WhooHoo!
I am so grateful that I have already made friends and connections in China! Through both my FB teaching alumni page and the Chinese expat pages, and then referrals to other contacts, I have learned so much about my new city and all it has to offer...and most importantly, how friendly and welcoming the people of China are! Yay! Plus, friends! I've already made 3 friends in Chengdu!!! Whoo Hoo! I have a hiking and workout buddy who teaches at my school, a business owner-pal who's Chengdu old-skool expat (been there for years and years), another teacher friend at school, and various other contacts and acquaintances from Chengdu and Shanghai!!
I am so grateful for a few minutes today to stop and be grateful! The visa paperwork process is overwhelming, the time flying by when I don't seem to have done anything to prepare my own household to move is daunting, the time needed to meet all my friends and family and travel to SA and FTW to see everyone before I go, along with numerous lunches, dinners, farewells is a lot... and I am grateful for it all!
I love you people...here... and there!
I’m grateful for many events of the past few days! A successful trip to Houston to get my documents authenticated by the Chinese Consulate, a lovely massage, and finalization of all documents for my Chinese Visa! My new school submitted the online application in China, two days ago! We are crossing our fingers that the liaison can go pick up my work permit Monday! Then, I get to (oh, a priveledge LOL) drive to HTX *AGAIN* to get the real deal: VISA! Everything else has fallen into place, so I think this will, as well! Then all that’s left to do is buy my air ticket, pack up, sell, donate, organize, visit friends/fam, start staying awake super-late to adjust to time change, and GET ON THAT PLANE!!! Whoo Hoo!
It’s Groundhog Day! My Second Favorite Holiday (the first is my Bday, of course!). I’m grateful for one of the funniest movies ever! I’m grateful that my personal Punxatawny Phil has determined the coming year is going to be sunny and full of wonderfulocities!!! I am so grateful the notary came through! My Sis has a friend who is a notary, and she notarized my teaching license yesterday! WhooHoo! On Monday, I’ll have her send it to the FL Sec of State through an expediting service, so I should have it in hand on Weds! From there, it will all go down to the Consulate in Houston and the following week, I’ll have my visa!
I am so grateful that my Sis was willing to help me out, and that her she has a friend who happens to be a notary! Otherwise, I would have had to FLY to FL, and take care of all this in person, which could have taken days, plus lots of dollars! I’m grateful that my new job has offered a substantial increase in income, so that IT DOESN’T MATTER that I will be spending more than the amount my new school has agreed to reimburse me for visa processing! Security, finally!
I am grateful that I will have more security now, in so many ways! An increase in income, rent paid for, my OWN place which is much larger and will be ALL MINE, a new job with new opportunities to create positive relationships, leaving behind toxic work relationships, gaining IB experience and qualifications, the chance to get a doggie (!), and freedom from financial fear and no more “scraping buy”. I welcome the opportunity to experience the THRIVING LIFESTYLE, while slamming the door on the “barely surviving lifestyle ”!
I am so grateful for all the opportunities that have come my way; I have WORKED HARD for all of them! Although I was impatient (well, is waiting 3 years patient enough?), I’m achieving goals and long-held dreams! I am so grateful I get to move to China!
I’m grateful I finally got the damn credit agencies to remove fraudulent collection from my account, so that my credit score jumped up. I’m grateful for my local credit union—personal service, I love it! I’m grateful for my good friends who have stuck by me as I waded through muck and splashed them with it—they didn’t complain; just extended me a helping hand. I’m grateful for the part of my family that loves me, and expresses it. I’m grateful for new faces in my life that are helping me evolve, move beyond old patterns, and helping me get ME back. I’m grateful the truck is stilll running and that there is an opportunity to sell it for a small wad of cash. (Very, very small, LOL)! I’m grateful that I’ll be able to give that small wad to the friends that sold me the truck under value in the first place!
I’M GRATEFUL THAT I AM MOVING TO CHENGDU! OMG!!!