What I have noticed since I returned to Chengdu from my month-long exploration of the formerly-known-as- Kham-area of Tibet (colonized by PRC and now known as Western Sichuan), is that my stress levels are sky high due to both work stress and personal life events. My energy and desire to exercise has waned, my patience deteriorated, and my feelings of exasperation and frustration at work scenarios have exploded beyond manageable limits. In other words, I am really, really. really, unhappy with the work situation. But during all of this, I have been able to recognize that my reaction to the BS at work is causing the majority of my unhappiness. And my inability to control my reaction is a direct result of decreased exercise, asana, and meditation. I am tuning out with old habits instead of reducing my stress with my healthy tool kit. However, throughout the last few weeks, I have been aware of my stressful thoughts, feelings, and resultant actions. I am trying to practice a bit of self-compassion, when I can remember to do so! A lot has happened with the new school year and relocating to a new apartment. Half the stress has been caused by the move-- the other half by work conflict, drama, and other work-related happenings. I also realize that all of this is temporary, as I get settled in my new home, learn new collaboration techniques that work with new co-teachers, and work on my Self and my well-being.
This course will help me return to my center of balance and well-being, as well as bring useful tools to work for myself and my co-teachers. Yay! I have already started writing daily gratitude posts again, and this one action has helped immensely. I am looking forward to bringing more self-awareness to work (all day!), along with self-compassion, compassion to students and co-workers, and positive change--the biggest positive change being in my attitude, perceptions, and resilience!
Today, I am grateful for my new apartment
"...42 steps from the street... this is where we used to live... "
It seems like I live in luxury now... or again. All I want to do is reorganize and redecorate and get new furniture. I am in a home I can make hygge and have dinner parties...again! I envision dinner parties and girls' nights! Romantic evenings at home... in the marble bath! I see the Chinese tea cabinet and Tibetan furniture. I am creating walls of nature items: bamboo and plants and seeds and pods and flowers. I feel secure and settled here. I want to stay!
I am creating a home, and it feels so good!