I have established an early-warning DEFCON anti-fuckwit system for you fellow Singletons out there in the dangerous world of dating.
DEFCON 5 - No dates in the near future, all is safe in the world, happiness is assured (since it's created from within anyway) and you are having fun in the sun with your BFFs.
DEFCON 4 - Dating has begun, gird your loins and batten down the fuckin' hatches.
DEFCON 3 - Somethin' ain't quite right; early signs of Wanker behavior is evidencing itself, via texts or FB, but never in direct fashion, like face-to-face mature communication, or phone calls.
DEFCON 2 - Do not ignore this warning! They showed who they are, so believe them. Immediate evacuation to safe zone imminent.
DEFCON 1 - All Fuckwittage has broken loose and emotional contamination has been dispersed via text or FB. Retreat to safe haven immediately to avoid the catastrophic devastation of dysfunctional behavior, immature emotional response by text, inauthenticity, inability to communicate, unkind words, and just crazy-mother-fucker behavior.
Until the system downgrades the warning to DEFCON 4, delete and block all incoming coms. After a safe period (and more fun with BFFs), the system will reboot to DEFCON 5 and cautious dating may then resume. Remain vigilantly on-watch for Fuckwits, Wankers, and Dinguses (Dingii?), because you are ALWAYS surrounded and they are just waiting to penetrate weak defenses!